"Later" Might Not Come

Forget the calories! I want to enjoy sweets while I can with this cutie! :)    

 Do you ever think about time? Maybe you think of the limits of time when you are rushing to get out the door in the blurr of a frantic schedule, or when trying to shorten the cooking time of whatever you have sizzling on the stove for dinner. Or, maybe you want time to stop or go by so slowly that you cannot notice when you are in the arms of your lover or holding your baby girl/boy close. But... do you ever think about that time not being available for you to spend away or enjoy anymore? 

     I am going through the book, Love at Last Sight, with some of the college girls from my church. The idea of the book is to engage with the key* relationships in your life as if it were the last time.  Moreover,  the purpose is to intentionally grow and deepen these core relationships in such a way that you won't have to regret and live with the "I wish I would have" remorse later on. The book covers several different aspects of relationships, whether romantic or platonic, and I would give you a thumbs-up to check it out! In one of the readings from this week, the authors (Kerry and Chris Shook) touched on the principle of "last to first." This ideas says that, "...My chances to show love are not always going to be there- [that] makes me realize I need to say and do the most important things first." 

    Why is it so easy to forget what James 4:14 says? The NLT version of this verse reminds us that our life is like the morning fog, here for a little while and then gone. I do not want to live a life of regrets as a wife in wishing that I would have said, "I love you!" more or that I wish I had stopped doing my "important" jobs to just slow down and give Derek a hug and attention. While realistically we cannot give 100% ALL of the time, we can be intentional in the time that we are given and do have. It is true that if something is important to you, in this case your spouse, then you will do whatever it takes to reconcile, to be joyful, to forgive, to love, to spend time together, to talk, to be intimate, to laugh, to dream together- to love like it could be the last time you have the chance to.

     This has been on my mind in recent weeks and now more than ever in reading this book. I/we have tried to make the most of our time together. Derek is in a busy season with ministry right now and I am trying my best to be supportive and to make coming home for him something to smile about. In the last week we have stayed up laughing way past our normal "bed time," we had a picnic at the little park across the street, and picked out fall candles together at the store. Even letting him choose the scents he liked best was out of the norm. Time as a vapor does not have mercy on life being "normal" all the time. When it's gone, it's gone.

Candle picking at Bath & Body Works. Interesting experience! 

     In what ways are you letting excuses of all different kinds get in the way of maximizing time with your lover? Maybe you are in a busy season of life too and can't seem to even get a meal ready before 9pm for you both? Put the schedules, extra-curricular commitments, and excuses aside for the next few minutes and intentionally make some time to be completely present with your spouse- mind, body, and spirit. 

     *Don't wait for a special occasion to use your "fancy" plates- serve breakfast, lunch, and dinner on them one day. Is your water bill going to suffer THAT much? Will the extra time to wash them be THAT much to gripe over? Didn't think so...

     *Ladies, surprise your husband and slip into something from your "private" clothes drawer. What's the excuse now? He sure won't complain! Go ahead, live a little... ;)

     *Stay up later than you are "supposed" to every now and then to have fun. The lethargy the next day at work will not compare to the memories that were made. Derek was having a rough day a few months ago so when he got home later that night I suggested we go to the movies. So, we went to a late showing and had pizza afterward at 1:30am! That is not like us and I was literally sick to my stomach afterward, but it is one of my favorite spontaneous memories!  

  

      *There is never an excuse valid enough to keep you from saying "I love you." Please, please don't let the sun go down and your husband/wife not be assured of your affections towards them! I always regret the nights I let go by that I allow myself to stay angry over trivial things. It is never worth it for me in the end...

Picnic with Derek... just because.

Why keep waiting to do life and enjoy each other "later" when later might not come?

     How about you? When was the last time you took a risk and did something spontaneous just because? What excuses are you using that keep your from enjoying a rich relationship with your husband? What would it be like if you thought about this moment being the last with your love? Would you be regretful or have peace that you made the most of your time together here on earth? Pinpoint the excuses and do away with each one! Take advantage of the time that has not escaped you yet, please.

"We exaggerate yesterday. We overestimate tomorrow. But we vastly underestimate today! When your mind is focused on yesterday, your heart will be filled with regret from the past. When your mind is focused on tomorrow, your heart will be filled with anxiety about the future. When your mind is focused on today, your heart will be filled with hope. If you change what you do today, your life will change!" John Maxwell, Today Matters