So...Baby?

We are just a day away from our two-and-a-half year married mark. Woohoo! Before we tied the knot, the topic of "kids" came up a few times and we thought we would wait two years and then try to have a "little Janney." Well, then two years came too fast and we were not ready yet. No big deal, not to us at least.

After our first year mark though, it seemed like something shifted and the avalanche of baby probing questions started to come through:

"When are you going to have kids?"

 

"You know, you two will have cute babies. When is that going to happen?"

 

"Are you pregnant? Do you want to be?"

"So... baby news?"

 

"What is your baby plan?"

"It can take a long time. You should start soon. When? "

 

"Are you on birth control?"

 

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

 



I didn't mind the questions too much at first as it was fun talking about being a mom someday. However, then it got a little too personal and I found myself getting overwhelmed with how often curiosity was striking others to ask. I love babies and I am looking forward to us being parents one day, but we are just not there yet. Then, I started thinking about why I was getting bothered and it was more about me and not so much about the person that was asking the questions. I had to pinpoint reasons why I was getting asked in the first place to realize that it wasn't because someone thought that I was weird for not having a tot in tow, or that I might be trying to hide something.

I narrowed down some of the top reasons why people ask newlyweds about a baby, in hopes that you will understand and not get annoyed like I did. Most people really do have the best of intentions at heart!

Top 3 Reasons Why Newlyweds Get Asked About BABY:

1. Curiosity

Let's face it. Who wouldn't want to know if/when their favorite duo is going to be having a mini-me? :)

2. To make conversation

I have found that being around moms naturally brings up baby talk. If you are the only one in the conversation without a little cutie, then be ready to get asked. And, that is ok. Most of the time it is just a mom being sweet to you knowing that your time will come eventually, and she might just want to give you a (valuable!) tip or two.

3. Because YOU asked

One of life's greatest fascinations to me is the miracle of the human body being able to have a baby. I just think it is one of the coolest things to learn about and to ask questions about. Naturally, I like to ask people who have "been there, done that" so that I can hear different perspectives. When you ask, be ready to get asked in return. If you don't want to, then don't bring it up or politely decline to comment. :)


Like I said, most people that ask newlyweds questions about starting a family just love you and want to be in the "know" of when you will be sharing baby news. Try not to be quick to get offended or upset by the questions. I figured that out, thank God. You can politely deter the conversation in a different direction if you get uncomfortable by baby questions or kindly decline to talk about it. Some people prefer to tell a joke or ask a personal question back, but I don't think I am skilled like that yet. :)

Have you been asked the "b" questions a lot since you got married? How did you cope? Or, are you a MatureMarried with different insight for one of the reasons above? I would love to know!