Lessons I’ve Learned in the First Week of School that Apply to Marriage
Go, Knights!
I haven’t been a full-time student in a while because of
having to work, getting married, and other life happenings. My “plan” would have already had the check box marked of graduated by now, but I just have to keep reminding myself that it’s OK I haven't finished yet like I thought and I can’t
be competing with anyone. *Constant reminder* So, I’m back in serious action.
My first week has been interesting to say the least, but I survived my first
day at UCF. For you non-Floridians, the University of Central Florida is
ginormous and has the second largest student population in the nation. While the
campus is beautiful and there is a lot of opportunity at this research based
school, this number of students and too many buildings is a
recipe for disaster when I'm included. Sadly, I have to admit that I sat through an entire hour of a class that
wasn’t even mine. I’ll end my first day tragedies there. Sigh, I’m not even a freshman.
On the
plus side, I ran into a few people that I haven’t seen in a few years. How that
happened in the sea of people, I do not know. While I got prepped the night
before and during the first day of class, I made some observations as a student that relate
to me as a Young Married:
1.
Show up-
Just like I have to be present in class to get necessary information, I need to “show up” in my marriage. I can’t expect to coast on cruise
control and magically hope my marriage will arrive at our desired destination.
Additionally, in the same fashion that the professor doesn’t carry my workload
for me, I can’t expect Derek to take on the responsibilities and success of our marriage alone when this is a three
person union: God, Derek, and me.
2.
Make time
for studying and learning- I can’t give up on being a student
of my husband. The day I fail to do this is the day that I have to “cram” for
the test when it’s already too late. With time and applied focus, I’ll gain
sound knowledge on the “subject” (Derek) and be happy with the outcome. J
3.
Prioritize-
If I don’t have my priorities in order, I won’t do well in school. Likewise, it
can be too easy to let my marriage fall last in importance if I don’t establish
where it belongs upfront. This semester my priorities look something like this:
#1 My relationship with Jesus, #2 My relationship with Derek and our marriage,
#3 Focusing on school and being a student. I have my others ones and for this
semester being a student got bumped up to third. The first two should never
change for me.
4.
Plan-
If I don’t have an idea or a plan of where I want to go in my academic career,
I will end up spending more money on tuition than necessary and aimlessly
take classes for the sake of meeting requirements. I’ve, unfortunately, had to
learn some of this the hard way. In our marriages if we don’t dream together,
set family goals, and have aspirations for the future we will start to find
that we feel like our marriages have no purpose. If I can make the time to plan for a career then I want my and Derek’s marriage
to have a mission too!
5.
I don’t
know it all- Obviously, the professors I’m learning from are teaching me
the material because I don’t know it. In marriage, I don’t have all the answers
and never will. Experience will give me insight and knowledge to share with
others, but in stages that I haven’t yet reached I need to listen and ask for
help. As a student, pride can be my worst enemy. In marriage, pride will make
me fall. (Proverbs 16:18)
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